Thrive In Gratitude: God's Not Dead- my social experiment

Thrive In Gratitude: God's Not Dead- my social experiment: Yes, it was me. If you don't know what I'm talking about then I apologize for not being able to make you a part of my social experim...

God's Not Dead- my social experiment

Yes, it was me. If you don't know what I'm talking about then I apologize for not being able to make you a part of my social experiment. Either, I somehow skipped you when I was going through my phone or I don't have your phone number. See, the majority of the people on my phone's contact list don't have my new number (new as of Dec 2014) and after watching the movie "God's Not Dead" I felt compelled to send out my mass of text messages, saying that very thing (which is how the movie ended). Wondering all the while what would happen. I mean, if I got a text message at 1 AM saying God's Not Dead, from a number I didn't know, there would be a few interesting thoughts that would go through my mind. The people who knew it was me thought I was having a breakdown or something. "Are you ok?" "What's going on?" I love them for that. I wish I could say I had a divine encounter, but that is not the reality of, or the reason for, the comment.
My favorite response was Fuck Off. I chuckled because of course I knew who she was, right, so it was even more entertaining to get that one! Although, to be honest, I was surprised I didn't get more of that general sentiment.
Mostly, it was silent. My hope is that the message was read with curiosity and maybe even a tiny hint of goodwill. I only received three replies stating that I had the wrong number. I wish I could contrive some sort of statistical analysis that shows the much higher number of no responses over the negative responses shows that the people were not bothered to see God's name scroll across the screen of their smart phone. I don't think I would get away with taking that leap.
There was one group conversation that ended up making me confused...2 people asked who the sender was, and their confusion was apparent. Although, the one seems to have realized it was an opportunity to make the other person completely freaked out and said a few strange things about wishing he knew who and where he was, along with a pic of Yoda...then mimicked the other guy when he said he wanted taken off the thread.... Well played young man, well played.
If ya can't beat em- join em.
I didn't know what to expect. Maybe in some small way, I wanted to know if the unexpected intrusion of God into people's lives would lead to a positive outcome. I know, I know...this experiment doesn't even cover that.
I will say, that when someone that I knew didn't have my number, replied with 4 little words, I was happy-
"Who said he was?"
Maybe that is what I found out.. For people who know God, the false statement makes no sense. Of course he's not dead, might as well have just said "No shit Sherlock"; and for people who don't know God, they don't care one way or another.

Thrive In Gratitude: Where do you find hope?

Thrive In Gratitude: Where do you find hope?: I've been at the bedside of many patients, and their family members, having a crisis. They, or someone they love, may die. It happened y...

Where do you find hope?

I've been at the bedside of many patients, and their family members, having a crisis. They, or someone they love, may die. It happened yesterday. He wasn't even out of his 50's yet; he wouldn't qualify for AARP for another 6-7 years. The doctor was only giving him a 50/50 chance of survival. I immediately went into turbo nurse mode (making my assignment 3 ICU patients instead of 2). Hanging drips, pushing morphine, and trying as hard as I could to carry myself with confidence. When he arrived, he was colored like death. His face, his hands, his feet were all grey, cold, and horrifying. Knowing what I know, and having seen what I have seen at the countless bedsides I've been at, I knew without even a faint glimmer of doubt, that what I could accomplish in the next hour or two might possibly save his life. As you can imagine on a Saturday at 1 am, in a critical care unit, nurses are on their own. Sure call the doctor, get a feel for what his/her expectations are and essentially explode from there. 50/50 chance. What on Earth would sway those statistics in this patient's favor?
Me. His nurse.

Hope. What is hope? what do people mean when they say " I hope..."? I hope that my next contract goes smoothly and that I enjoy it. I wish? I expect? The missing qualifier is on the who or what, that one might expect to influence the subject.
I hope that the Universe?
I hope that the bottom of my Starbuck's coffee?
I hope that President Obama?
I wish that my parents? dog? friend? lover?
I hope my Dad's nurse keeps him alive.
Do you know what my theory is? The person who is doing the wishing and hoping, is also potentially the same "who or what" that is expected to influence the subject, situation, etc. So essentially, people are wishing on themselves, or maybe a cashier, a beautician, a doctor or nurse, possibly even a football team to influence things in their favor. So, does wishing on yours/ or someone else's ability instill the required faith to overcome the anxiety that prompted the hope/wish in the first place? When it seems that the very fact that you feel compelled to wish/hope in the first place, indicates that you don't believe you can do it; although it may mean you think someone else can.

I once wished that a certain Senior in High School would fall deeply and madly in love with me, so much so that I made my Mom buy a shirt he had lifted off the rack and looked at, but put away. He touched it, so it needed to be mine. (I'll be honest- I never even considered that he looked at in disgust. Or even worse, that he would see me wear it and think it was weird that I was wearing men's clothing.) I can only say this- it definitely didn't hurt.

I don't want to imply that wishing/hoping on someone's expertise, knowledge, skill, talent isn't effective. I only want to broach the subject/idea about the wishing and hoping that goes along with faith in God (Purely on a psychological level, for anyone out there that doesn't like "God talk".)
I conjured up an exquisite suicide plan while lying on the floor of my walk in closet, as well as standing in front of a critical care drug dispensing machine. In the months, days, hours leading to my breaking point, I never begged for insulin to do it's job correctly, or for medical equipment  to be easily available when I needed to steal it from the supply room. These things, the functioning of insulin and equipment, relied on an outside force to be effective. An entire manufacturing team as a matter of fact. Broken down, it seems a bit infantile to place one's hopes on something one can't control. So, for all the things that can't be controlled or hoped for, what do people do? What is the natural, unbiased response to a crisis that can not be influenced by anyone?
Why have I spent all of my adult life looking for a definition and explanation of the feeling I had inside me that there was something missing? What is that? Some deep planted memory of when I wanted something I couldn't have that I got from a commercial or movie, or friend, neighbor as a kid? For me, it is seemingly impossible to imagine not having God to pray to. Impossible to put my faith in the environment around me; impossible to put my faith in someone who doesn't have miracles hidden up their sleeves.
So I challenge you- where do you find hope?

Oh, the patient? I left around 7:30 am and he was pink, warm and free of pain. He was going to live at least one more day.

Thrive In Gratitude: ISIS and the Westboro Baptist Church

Thrive In Gratitude: ISIS and the Westboro Baptist Church: There was a picture last week that circulated the internet news outlets. It was of the 3 year old boy, lifeless on the beach, who drowned wi...

ISIS and the Westboro Baptist Church

There was a picture last week that circulated the internet news outlets. It was of the 3 year old boy, lifeless on the beach, who drowned with his mother and brother when a small raft his father had secured from a migrant smuggler, capsized in the sea. The father and now widower, broken from grief, stated he wouldn't attempt to flee any longer because now he had no happiness to fight for. I think I held my breath the entire time I was reading the article.
I wondered why our leadership hadn't done something yet; why it seemed that NO ONE was doing anything. I also felt incredibly ignorant about the whole situation. What was happening?
Who were the good guys? Who were the bad guys? The best answer I could come up with is that it depends on what you need from one side or the other, and at what time you need it. At least that's how I see it from my vantage point here in the beautiful rural countryside of Indiana. In the country I call home, the one where some of our biggest news stories are about social injustices, I see little focus on the international crisis occurring right now. Ironic. I remember thinking that apparently all AMERICAN lives matter. Others, eh, not so much. I'm sick to my stomach thinking about it.
I liken ISIS to being the Westboro Baptist Church, those who have a faith in one God would likely say that the teachings and behavior of that particular congregation do not follow the teaching of Jesus Christ and this one commandment- Romans 13:9-10 "Love your neighbor as yourself. Love does no wrong to others, so love fulfills the requirements of God's law." Being left with this teaching from Christ, it shows that what the Westboro Baptist Church teaches is a contradiction to the teachings of Christ, to the word of God.  Full of hatred, self-righteousness, indignation (or as ISIS has shown- murderous, disregard for life) for anyone who doesn't submit to their religious truth- it seems to be unjust that they can use the label of Christian, or Muslim for that matter.The Quran, based on the teachings of the prophet Mohammad, specifically refers to Jews and Christians as "people of the book" who should be protected and respected. I have heard groups described as Extremist Muslim groups or Extremist Christian groups. I feel these are such misleading titles and that in all honesty "Muslim" and "Christian" should be dropped. The religion they say they identify themselves as, is not accurate- it would be like calling a stay at home mom an extreme feminist. Or myself, raised in a meat eating family, part of an Extremist Vegetarian group. It just screams insanity. Hanging on to a defined group because parts of your group share similarities with some parts of the overall group, isn't even logical. I certainly don't claim to be a vegetarian because I eat fruits and vegetables.
Could it be that few countries have stepped in because they don't want to be identified with a particular group of people, who happen to have a religious affiliation? Both of which believe in one God. Being fearful of accusers who would call them anti-Muslim or anti-Christian. Would championing an international social justice cause hurt a country's belief systems? If people will champion the keeping of  religious beliefs, traditions and historical references from any social aspect of our communities, does that mean we have no duty to intervene when human rights are being violated, even if those violations are based on religious ideologies? As America seeks to remove God and Christianity from being the cornerstone principle that this country was founded on, and instead promotes a moral ground work based on individual rights, above all, (at least the rights that the current majority agrees with) then what happens when the majority becomes less and less moral? What will be the touchstone for those rights? Will the evolution of human rights be a progression of a loving, caring, compassionate people? Or will the evolution of human rights be a progression of entitlement, individual promotion and narcissism? Does it have to be either or? Can a country of people agree that the moral compass of a nation should be based on the inherent value of all life and maybe stop tearing each other apart when it's actually a common goal both sides believe in?
I want to believe that all people see the value in everyone they meet, because we all bleed the same. How will we become the change? How can we live the basic belief that life matters?

Why this from a raving lunatic?

I've probably discouraged a huge number of readers because people might believe, like I did, that I wouldn't get anything out of reading something Christian because I'm already smarter than the author because God doesn't exist. Throwing the baby out with the bathwater. It's all good though. If it is meant for someone to read, it will be.

I've often been thought of as the sarcastic,cocky, quick witted girl, with the raunchy, foul, racist, inappropriate against the human race, jokes. People may not describe me in those exact words, but if you've ever read my other blog 'So There I Was' you know that I've not always been particularly tactful with a clean use of vocabulary. I don't know how else to describe myself but as someone who sees it now. My intention in life was never to hurt someone's feelings, offend anyone with my view points, or ridicule anyone else for theirs. Trust me when I tell you that I failed many, many times at meeting those intentions. There will come a day when I will be called out on my past. I might be completely discredited by people because of the glaring contradictions that exist between the me of now and the me of then. I am not suggesting that I've somehow transformed into Pollyanna or Mary Poppins, or that I'm not the same person I used to be. Lord knows I can't sing. And as far as I can tell, I still have all those pieces of my personality.What I am doing is sharing my desire to be better. What I'm doing is inviting you to grow with me. 

I'm incredibly ignorant about a lot of things. Calculus, Art History, Car repair, investing, raising children and cooking, to give you a taste of  things I am poorly versed on. Watching the news is so confusing to me because it just leaves me asking questions. Most often questions about why any Kardashian is even worth the air time when there are so many more important things to cover. I've always been idealistic and opinionated. Yes, even about things I have no idea about. The word you are looking for is arrogant. That would be me.

The past 10 months have been incredibly humbling. I have gone from the perfect suicide plan to a passion for doing something that makes the world a better place. A desire to give of my time, treasures and talents to be the change I want to see in the world. Ghandi wasn't making a joke with that one. Neither was Jesus Christ when he said we are all loved by God and that we should love our neighbor like ourselves. 

Talking about God seems to be such an uncomfortable, itchy, twitchy thing. This blog will talk about my faith, my walk, and my gratitude for every second of my life, then and now. It is because of God that I am happier, healthier, involved, and encouraged. I don't know exactly what the term "born again christian" means. I know it makes me think of schizophrenics and serial killers. On what basis I got this idea probably goes back to the list of things I am completely ignorant about. I've spent years avoiding Christianity because of my general belief that all Christians are born again and that they were all raving lunatics. (Judge much? Yep I sure did.) Having spent a large part of my adult life reading about various religions and beliefs, the one thing that lurked in the back of my mind was that I wouldn't adopt a belief with blind faith. I had the same catch phrase of a lot of other people, most notably on every dating site I have ever used. "I'm not religious. I'm spiritual." Which makes me a bit ashamed that I used such an easy way out. It was my way of saying "I want you to think I am a good person, who has the ability to think on a deeper, more meaningful level. A level that is socially acceptable to the world I live in and doesn't make people judge me as a raving lunatic." Modern day religions have had plenty of unsavory secrets that have been unearthed and crucified. People in such a high level of community engagement simply cannot be trusted and therefore the religion is just quackery and should possibly be taken out of society as much as possible. Who would ever put their faith in such a thing? Can I introduce you to Bill Clinton and the unsavory level of satisfaction Americans have with our elected officials in general? The damage, and unforgivable-ness, of uncovered misdeeds and outright crimes are treated very differently based on the social beliefs of a person.  So on this "spiritual" quest, I hoped to find a religion that made sense, I didn't believe in any religious faith that promoted killing in the name of God. I wanted my religion to reassure me that I was a good, honest person and that life would transition, through the process of dying, into something else. I wanted a religion that didn't ask me for money or require me to actually do anything. As a matter of fact, I wanted a religion that was respected, morally perfect and socially trendy. 

Yeah- that didn't happen.

The joke was on me. 

In what world do people get to pick and choose what is right based on their own experience? Maybe that's where the Kardashians live, but not us common folk. Picking only bits and pieces of a religious tradition is like basing health insurance reimbursement on patient satisfaction. The reality is that if the patient would have listened to the expert and followed each necessary recommendation the patient would most likely be much better off and have lower healthcare costs. But apparently insurance companies would rather base the payout for health care on how quickly a call light gets answered or how good the hospital food is. Note that they don't care if the patient dies, as long as whoever answered that questionnaire was "satisfied". The one thing that I can tell you about patient satisfaction, having been a nurse for 19 years now, is that patients who are thankful for their care, and see their healthcare as something that should never be taken for granted, will always be more satisfied. 

This blog is about trying to be less "SELF" centered and more grateful for the life I do have. Gratitude unlocks happiness and fulfillment; happiness and fulfillment can be contagious and before you know it, the world has changed.

A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down.

In Your honor,

Brooke